Wednesday, April 4, 2012

Different Hemispheres

I like the people from Marketing, those free spirited right brained folks who are unhindered by practical concerns from plans they sketch out on bar napkins. My job is to fret over those practical concerns. Their phone calls all start the same way: "Neil, I know this is an odd request but..."

In that brief pause after "but" my mind goes back to school, back when I was a landscaper. God I loved that job. I'm not bragging or anything but I was a very good landscaper. The gentle witness marks left on lawns from my Bunton walk-behind mower were so straight and even that builders could use them like chalk lines to stake foundations for homes they were building. I liked working on the lawn equipment and the smell of cut grass and gasoline. I liked working outside. I liked the total lack of responsibility. In college I had to take an aptitude test to see what job would be best for me. I took this test during my last semester so results were pointless. It said I should be an Arborist. I was curious enough to look up what an Arborist was. It’s like a tree doctor. I remember thinking “oh hell, that makes sense.” Perhaps I should have taken that test in high school.

Back to reality. "Neil, I know this is an odd request but [insert some super complicated half baked scheme, like changing the engine in a car to one that the car wasn’t designed for yet]."

Last weekend I stopped by work and got one of those calls. "Neil, I know this is an odd request but [I take a deep breath] can you get a hold of a bicycle, put it in the back of a (prototype) Encore, and take pictures?" Marketing was working on a commercial and they want to make sure a bicycle actually fits. Finally a request that I can get my little mind around. I keep a bicycle in my truck in case an opportunity to ride opens up.

So I bring my bike into the garage, spend about 2 seconds figuring out the best way to get it to fit, and send them pictures. I wrapped this project up in less than 5 minutes. All week I have been getting emails thanking me. A silly number of emails really. My bicycle might even make it into a commercial. The techs think I just made this request up so I could make sure my bike fits; I do like the new Buick Encore and made it clear to everyone I am getting one once they are in production. It was a good day; Arborists don’t get paid to put a bike in the back of a car.

10 comments:

  1. Interesting. I remember a few years ago I had my bike on the back of my car. My boss says "I am not sure it is safe out there....you should bring it in" so I went out and got it. Funny thing was we worked in a nice neighborhood....and I would love to watch out the window if someone was trying to get my bike off the rack. Long story short, we spent the next hour talking about the bike, suspension, disc brakes, ect. Clearly, I was the only cyclist....but to see everyone huddled around my bike was funny. Like it was an alien or something.

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  2. BTW, You racing Yankee? Look for me at the Custer Cyclery Tent!

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  3. No Yankee Springs race for me; I am going back down to Florida this week with my daughters. I'm not in race shape anyway. I do plan on Ft. Custer in June, maybe I will run into you then.

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  4. This makes you a pro cyclist. Well, sorta...kinda...

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  5. Dan, too funny, I almost pointed that out.

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  6. I don't don't know... They may choose an actor bike to do the commercial... I wouldn't get your bike's hopes up. ;)

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  7. If they go to Walmart and get a Schwinn (with reflectors) to do the commercial, I swear I will quit.

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  8. When I bought my first two cars I took my bike to the dealer to check if it would fit in the boot. If it didn't . . . I wouldn't have got the car!

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  9. I never wanted a car, and was fine without one for years. My ex waited until after I had just run a half marathon in record heat, was dehydrated and under duress, to take me shopping. I do remember the words "Show me the cheapest car on your lot" come out of my mouth, and then something resembling a red roller skate came home with me. Had I been coherent, I might have made a more "bike-friendly" decision.

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